Breaking Bad Season 5 Leaked Script

TOP SECRET - CONFIDENTIAL BREAKING BAD SEASON 5 OFFICIAL SCRIPT

FOR EYES ONLY

S05 [part 2] E04

SCENE - Jesse and Walt have conspired to cook one last great batch of 110% pure supermeth in Hank's basement while he is at the policeman's ball

Jesse: Hey Mister Walter White, who is my chemist professor and best friend, please pass the beaker so I can drip this purple liquid steam into a spiral tube, this shit gon be da bomb yo!

Walt: I swear, you are so incompetent Jesse although you are reluctantly my protege we are quite an odd couple and working with you is a bother! Will you PLEASE try to not be such an inconvenience...I wouldn't even want to cook nachos with you for crying out loud!

Jesse: Actually Mister White I am cooking nachos in your antique mortar and pestle upstairs, they should be done right about now...

*explosion sound* *Jess and Walt stare at each other as microwave crashes through the basement roof and tips over table full of glassware*

Jesse: I guess it wasn't microwave safe? 

Walt: JESSE!!!

*Hank enters the scene, walking down stairs into basement*

Jesse (whispering): I thought you said he wasn't supposed to be home until late!

Hank: what are you two handsome bastards doing in my basementroonie? Walt, who's the kid?

Walt: He's a friend of a friend, I am putting him on a straight and narrow path

Hank: Glad to hear it buddy. Listen, the toilet upstairs is blocked and I need to drop the cosby kids off at the pool, if you know what I mean heh hehh hehh

*Hank enters basement toilet room and closes door*

Walt (whispering in harsh voice): THIS IS ALL YOUR FAULT!!!

Jesse: ALL-RIGHT already! Don't have a cow Mr White, I will think of something...

Hank (from behind toilet door): hey is it just me or can anyone else smell meth cooking in here?

*walt slowly reaches into jacket and hands jesse a tiny gun*

Walt: There's no time. You have to do it, its the only way. Now or never Jesse

*Jesse raises gun to his own head and pulls the trigger*
*but his hand slips and bullet richochets off a drainpipe into the toilet door*

Walt: NOOOOOOOOOO you idiot!!!

*toilet door busts open, Hank is covered in blood with pants around his ankles and gun drawn*

Hank (shouting and aiming his gun around): SHOTS FIRED REQUESTING BACKUP. WALT, GET DOWN! GET DOWN! THE CARTEL HAVE RETURNED TO FINISH THE JOB!

*Walt grimaces at Jesse with a knowing and fatherly look*
*Jesse runs to cower under broken table while Walt grabs the gun turns and fires three shots at Hank's back*

Jesse: What the hell did you just do man!? NOT COOL!

Walt: Finally, my job here is done

Hank (crawling down stairs dying): WALT! Did Skyler ask you to do this? It was Skyler trying to kill me all along, wasnt it. Or your son, I know he had something to do with this!

*Walk walks over and pours a beaker of half-cooked meth into Hank's mouth*

Walt: Goodnight, sweet prince

Marie (shouting from upstairs): Hank, are you down there? What the hell did you put in the microwave?

Jesse: Mister White, how are we gonna get out of here now?

*Jesse runs over to basement window and tries to open it*

Jesse: its stuck!

Walt: Unstick it then! Can't you do anything right? 

Jesse: Do something! There must be something you can use among all these chemicals

*Walt turns and stares at batch of freshly cooked meth*

Walt: Eureka. Jesse, fetch my pipe.

PLAY-STATION 4 ANNOUNCE

IT'IS ANOTHER ADITION OF SKIP-HOPZ-DOT-COM VIDYA GAME NEWS!!!!

>CLICK HEAR<

EVEN LONLIEST FOOL OF A HERMIT KNOW THE SONYMEN HAVE RELESED ALL ABOUT THERE NEW CONSOLE SOON TO BE EXPLODDING THE VIDEOCONSOLE MARKET:  THE PLAY STATION FOUR! 

MY COUSIN RANDY LIVE STEAMED THE PRESS CONFERENSE ON YOUTUBES AND I WILL TELL THEM ALL ABOUT IT.....

PLAY STATION 3 WAS A HARD ACT 2 FOLLOW BUT PLAY STATION 4 ("PS-4") WILL HAVE ALL THE GAMMING FEATERS U EXPECT AND MOAR..  CIRCUT BOARD BLUEPRINT SMUGGLED OUT OF A FACTORY IN THE MOCCASIN OF A CHINAMAN HAS SHOWN THE POWER OF SONYS NEW CELL PROCESOR WITH 2000MHZ  AND CAN BE OVERCLACKED TO RIVAL THE DEMANDING MODERN GAMES SUCH AS CRYSIS 2 WARFARE AND UNREAL TOURNAMENT 2012. PS-4 WILL FEATERE UP TO 40000 POLYGONS PER SQUARE INCH,, ALLOWING FOR THE BUSHIEST AND REALISTIC EYEBROWS EVER SEEN IN A VIDEO GAME. WHEN IT COMES TO RAM, PS4 HAS 7 GIGS WHICH IS MORE THEN RANDYS ALIEN-WARE LAPTOP SO U CAN SEE PS-4 WILL BE A HEAVY HITTER FOR DECADES 2 COME!

SONYS PS4 WITH REVOLUTION "REMOTE" CONTROLLER FOR YOU'RE GAMMING PLEASURE!

A HUEG LINE UP OF GAMES WILL BE RELESED FOR PS-4 INCLUDING YOURE FAVORITES SUCH AS 'KILL ZONE 4 COLLECTOR EDITION' AND 'UNCHARTED 4: DRAKE GOES FISTING' BUTT FEAR NOT YOUNG READER,, PLAYSTATION 4 WILL BE OLD-COMPATIBLE WITH OUR FAVORITE PLAY STATION GAMES OF YORE SUCH AS CROC: LEGEND OF THE GOBBOS AND GEX 3D. NOW YOU'RE PATHETIC LIFE IS FINALLY COMPLETE

SUM NEW FEATERS ARE ANOUNCED FOR THE INTERFACE INCLUDING A "CROSS MEDIA BAR" WHICH WILL ALLOW U TAEK A SWIG OF SMOOTH EASY DRINKING JACK DANIELS WHILE U RELAX IN FRONT OF YOURE COMPLETE MEDIA CENTER SOLUTION...PHOTO SLIDESHOW AND REALPLAYER MEDIA PLAY BACK...ITS ALL IN THE BOX 

THE NEW "EZ-GRIP" WHITE CONTROLER MATCHES YOURE FAVORITE CARDIGAN

PLAYSTATION 4 IS ALL ABOUT THE SOCIAL GAMMING WHICH MEANS BASICALY THAT YOU'RE FRIENDS WILL APPEAR IN A GAMEPLAY AND TAKE OVER THE CONTROLER FROM U AT ANY MOMENT,, HOW EXITING

EVER WANT TO TELL YOU'RE FRIENDS THAT U ARE PLAYNG A PLAY-STATION GAME BUT YOU'RE NOT SURE HOW 2 GO ABOUT IT??? NOW U CAN SIMPLY PRESS THE SHARE BUTTON AND YOU'R CONSOLE WILL POST A BLOG 2 ITS OWN LIVEJOURNAL ACCOUNT, PROBABLY YOUR PS4 WILL HAVE EVEN MORE FRIENDS THEN YOU RANDY AHAHAHAHH

VALVE'S "STEAM BOX" IS A RIVAL CONSOLE THE SONYMEN WILL BE CRUSHING

HOWEVER THE SUCESS OF PLAYSTATION 4 IS FAR FROM GURANTEED...GABEN NEWELL AND VALVE ARE RELEASING A PLAY STATION OF THERE OWN CALLED THE STEAM BOX. THE DETALS ARE NOT NOWN YET BUT IT'S SURE TO HAVE ALL YOU'RE FAVORITE PC GAMES SUCH AS THE SIMS NUDE MOD, HALF-LIFE ORIGINS AND EURO BOAT SIMULATOR. 

MEAN WHILE NINTENDO HAVE RELEASE A NEW PIECE OF SHIT KNOWN AS THE "WII 2" WHICH HAS TWICE AS MANY CONTROLERS AND A BRAND NEW GAME WHERE MARIO WEARS A RACOON SUIT. STAY TUNED...2013 IS AN EXITING TIME FOR GAMMERS!!!

If you like strippers this is the video for you

How thoughtful of you. Thanks Tim!

Gabe Newell Dies of Heart Attack

http://theglobaldaily.net/news/1333167946.html

(This story is still developing)
Celebrated game designer Gabe Newell is dead. According to official sources he died in hospital this morning following a heart attack.

Gabe was like a father to us all

Newell was rushed to Fair Oaks hospital after complaining of chest pains during a morning cycle earlier today, according to official sources. Efforts to save the game designer failed at around 6:30 AM. The death has come as a shock to friends and family, who report that Newell was in good health up until the massive heart attack ended his life

After having dropped out of Harvard University Newell spent thirteen years working for Microsoft Corporation, ultimately becoming a "Microsoft Millionaire". Newell has described himself as "producer on the first three releases of Windows". Inspired by Michael Abrash, who left Microsoft to work on the computer game Quake at id Software, Newell and another Microsoft employee, Mike Harrington, left Microsoft to found Valve in 1996. He and Harrington used their money to fund Valve through the development of Half-Life.

Gabe Newell was loved by many fans around the world, he will be remembered as one of the hardest working game designers of the last century. Thousands of fans have expressed their shock and grief on social networking websites such as Twitter, with famous people contributing and offering support to the friends and family as well. Lifelong friend Adam Sessler Tweeted 'I can't believe he is really gone...the world is poorer for it'. Gabe Newell was 49 years old.

Rolling in their grave: KERSER

IN a new regular feature I will explain which classic rappers are spinning in their graves due to the shitty new rap music of today...

The infamous KERSER is a battle raper from Sydney-town who is causing quite a stir on the facebook. Recently he boasted that his youtube video has 100000 views, big fucking deal. Many have put the hate on The Kerser because he is the most popular lad rapper in the country and the only battle MC who is openly gay. Despite these flaws most rap fans agree that he does indeed spit hot fyre, its probably better if we give in to his demands and step back for fear of being burned!


The Kerser in the booth during a steamy recording session

THE KERSER made a name for himself after an intense freestyle battle in the carpark after a Got Beef event, and when I say instense freestyle battle I mean stabbing a hobo to death with one of his many knives. Word on the streets says he was also seen in the area of the Black Saturday Bushfires in 2009 packing flint and steel, and he refuses to answer questions about his involvement with the Beaumont children.

For the above reasons and many more, P DIDDY is rolling in his grave.

Everything You Wanted to Know About Touhou But Were Afraid to Ask

Touhou Project (also known as Tha Shrine Maidenz) is a series of so called Japanese "video games" where the player controls a lolita girl who has to shoot down enemy foreigners. Hundreds of Touhou games have been produced so far and the trend shows no sign of stopping. The franchise has become wildly popular in recent years, giving birth to several comic books and action figures depicting the Touhou gang.

The magic of Touhou started in 2002 with the release of "The Embodiment of Scarlet Devil", an RPG (rolling play game) in which the object of the game is to rape a young girl on a subway platform. An important part of the game is avoiding the police patrols which will attempt to put a stop to your activities. To survive you will need to collect the powerups to increase your abilities and grab the magic 'spell card' which destroys all enemies on the screen. Players are awarded points for how quickly and efficiently they are able to complete the task at hand, and are ranked on a high score leaderboard online. The best players compete at the highest difficulty level; "lunatic", and compete for bragging rights on the high school playground or around the office water cooler.

Did you know: Touhou is a Japanese word literally translated as "girl with fat thighs"

Marisa Kirisame, one of the most popular Touhous

Popularity

Touhou has become one of the most popular anime franchises in mainstream Japanese culture, even winning multiple design awards around the world and being recognised by Andy Warhol who installed all the games on his laptop after obtaining the files at a LAN party. Recently it has started to gather steam in different countries around the world, becoming a favourite of young girls everywhere.

The rabid Touhou fans gather each year at Comiket, a Japanese comic book convention, to swap comics and engage in LARP (live action role playing) of their favourite character. It is common for fans of the series to produce their own fan works, including video games, dioramas and symphonies. Sony, the original creator of Touhou, encourages the creativity within the fanbase.

Did you know: Each year Japan exports over 700 tonnes of "hugging pillows" featuring Touhou characters.

The popularity of Touhou is due to the amount of characters in the franchise. There are well over 100 unique characters to collect (all of them female), each with their own loyal fanbase. Currently the most popular girl is Cirno, the ice demon.

In 2008 there was controversy over Touhou when a young boy brought a gun to school and shot 4 of his classmates after playing a Touhou game. This caused the Japanese government to crack down on "bullet hell" shooters, a genre of video games where players must shoot everyone and make them go to hell. Although bullet hell games where real people die are becoming increasingly rare in the marketplace.

Did you know: Pop sensation Justin Bieber owns a Touhou plushie.

With Touhou characters such as Miku Hatsune becoming well known in the West through Youtube, advertising and other media is it only a matter of time before the franchise becomes a worldwide hit into the future and beyond. Excelsior!